ilyilyid
by Karussell
Summary: When her cousin cried, he observed, he looked just like her. :tedromeda:
1. 71-80

**i love you, i love you. it's disgusting.**

[1971]

It smelled of rain and smoke and a nervous heart fluttered in his chest as he waited for her, back straight, shoulders squared, in one hand a lonely sunflower, in the other his wand, just in case.

[1972]

She danced with her cousin and the boy grinned and he wondered if he'd ever be able to chase away the last dark thoughts clouding her happiness, her smile, their life as he watched them, but he didn't think he would.

[1973]

The child came into their war-torn world with a mighty cry and a head full of rainbow and he knew and she knew that they'd do everything to just protect their little girl from the terrible things they had seen.

[1974]

Sometimes, she woke up screaming and he wrapped his arms around her trembling body and whispered soothing words and let her sob into his shoulder and she held onto him for dear life.

[1975]

When her cousin cried, he observed, he looked just like her; desperate and sad and angry and confused and so, so lost and he hid his face behind his hands like she did and flinched when somebody reached out for him.

[1976]

If they disagreed on something, she didn't raise her voice, never screamed or even got angry, she just grew very quiet and her face became a stony mask and when he couldn't make her smile anymore, he knew she wasn't thinking about their argument anymore.

[1977]

Her lips tasted like chocolate on the day of his twenty-sixth birthday and her hair smelled like cinnamon still and and their daughter squealed in disgust when he kissed her mother and he didn't think he'd ever been happier.

[1978]

They stopped trying for another child when their daughter was barely five, because he couldn't bare the thought of losing her and she couldn't bare the thought of leaving them.

[1979]

First died her favourite uncle, then her estranged father, then the uncle she never talked about and then her cousin, the one he'd never known, vanished into thin air, and the letter she sent her little sister was returned unopened and it was a hard year for them both.

[1980]

Whenever he thought about the friends he'd lost along the way, the men and women who'd died to make the world a better place, he felt guilty for not doing more, but then he looked at his wife, reading their daughter a book, and he was glad to be home.

* * *

Title borrowed from a very nice song by Broadside. You should go listen to it.


	2. 81-90

**i love you, i love you. it's disgusting.**

[1981]

On the days after the Dark Lord vanished, he wanted to be happy, wanted to celebrate with the rest of the Wizarding World, but he couldn't, because his wife was mourning the loss of her last decent family member; a man in Azkaban might as well be dead.

[1982]

The one and only time their daughter met her aunt, her mother's younger sister, she made her little cousin laugh and got called a good for nothing half-breed by his father for it.

[1983]

Some nights, they both couldn't sleep, because she'd had a horrible childhood and he'd been singled out for his blood status one too many times, beause both of them had lost too many people and both of them had fought in a hopeless war, and in those nights, they sat outside and she explained the stars to him and he held onto her.

[1984]

As a boy, he'd found it incredibly embarassing and, frankly, ridiculous, how his mother clung to his neck every 1st of September and smothered him with kisses, but then his daughter turned eleven and he could suddenly understand.

[1985]

He'd realized he was in love with her when he had to brew amortentia in Potions and later smelled her hair as they hugged and she made cinnamon rolls for him on each of their anniversaries, because he'd muttered about cinnamon before kissing her for the very first time.

[1986]

His mother-in-law was impressed with her granddaughter's abilities when she spotted the girl changing her nose into a beak once in Diagon Alley, but she spit on the ground and left as soon as she realized who shared the girl's laughter.

[1987]

They weren't welcome in a lot of wizarding establishments, because she just looked so much like her older sister and people didn't forget easily, but she said she didn't care; she liked muggle restaurants and cafés and stores much better anyways.

[1988]

His wife and daughter got into arguments about the girl's name frequently and he always refused to pick a side, just used a shortened version of it as a compromise, but he secretly did like it very much, because a gift she truly had been.

[1989]

Every once in a while, he'd ask her if she ever regretted choosing him over her family and she'd kiss him until they were both breathless.

[1990]

They weren't totally on board with their child's decision to become an Auror, but she had grown up hearing stories about the brave men and women of a secret order, so what had they expected.


	3. 91-00

**i love you, i love you. it's disgusting.**

[1991]

It had been ten years since the You-Know-Who's Fall and there were celebrations all over Wizarding Britain and she thought about her cousin and he thought about the man's godson, already old enough for Hogwarts.

[1992]

The opening of the Chamber of Secrets was all over the news and though he had never heard of it before, he could tell that she had.

[1993]

The boy was a man now, with tired eyes and ashen skin, and his smile wasn't as bright anymore, but he was innocent and they all cried a little when they met again.

[1994]

The Order was active once more, probably had been for a a while, and of course they were approached - he had been a Member of the First Order, after all, however briefly -, but they declined joining; their daughter didn't.

[1995]

He had never had a reason to doubt his old headmaster, but he wished he had.

[1996]

When her sister escaped from prison, she became the girl she had been after breaking away from her family all those years ago, skittish and paranoid, barely leaving the house and holding him tight at night; she also cut her hair again.

[1997]

He knew he wouldn't come back home, wouldn't ever meet his grandchild, wouldn't ever get to scold his daughter's husband, wouldn't ever kiss his wife again, and it broke his heart, but it didn't matter as long as they were safe.

[1998]

The world stopped making sense.

[1999]

Her cousin was dead and her husband, too, and their miracle child and her son-in-law, but the little boy with turquoise hair learned something new every day and it was easy to smile at him, even if it wasn't easy to smile.

[2000]

When she was seventeen, she hadn't thought she'd ever drink tea with her little sister again, but she did, and her nephew fiddled with his cup nervously and the Boy Who Lived stood in the doorway as awkward as ever, asking for his godson, and it was very weird and strangely right.


	4. 01-10

**i love you, i love you. it's digusting.**

[2001]

My family's different than most others, I suppose, and sometimes, I'd really like to meet those smiley, happy, waving picture-people. My mum and dad. But most days, I'm quite content with Grandromeda and Grampa Lyall and Uncle Harry.

[2002]

Talking to Granny about her first Ted is as hard as getting Uncle George to talk about his twin brother. Talking to Gramps about my other Grandma is as easy as breathing. She's been dead for a lot longer, he says. He's had a lot more time.

[2003]

Cousin Draco, Granny tells me as Uncle Ron tries to murder him with glares alone, made a lot of mistakes in the past. He's trying to be a better person now, but some things are hard to forgive. He gives me candy, so he's fine in my book.

[2004]

I never noticed before, but there are no mirrors in our house. Nobody will tell me why; I don't think anybody but Grandromeda knows. When I'm older, she sighes, she'll show me a picture of her sister who's not Aunt Narcissa, and promises I will understand.

[2005]

I like Muggle school. Of course, I can't call it that in front of my friends, and my teacher is very much convinced someone is dyeing my hair, which is apparently something you shouldn't do with a seven-year-old boy, so she has a lot of talks with Granny and Gramps and even Uncle Harry, who is her main suspect, but I don't have to be present for those, so I just work on my control and hope they'll let me keep going.

[2006]

I know Aunt Narcissa has husband and his name is Lucius and he's in Azkaban and she gets real sad when people mention him. Draco does, too. His father is a bad guy, he explains without looking at me, but not a bad father, never a bad husband, and sometimes, you just can't help loving bad people. Even if you hate them. I don't think I understand.

[2007]

My favourite person in the world isn't Uncle Harry or Granny or Gramps. It's not even Vic, though she's a close second. It's Uncle Neville, because he understands better than anyone.

[2008]

Auntie Hermione likes to have tea with Granny and read me stories and history books. Auntie Ginny likes to talk about boggarts with Gramps and fly brooms and play Quidditch with me. Aunt Narcissa likes to look at me regretfully when she thinks I'm not looking.

[2009]

I am a Hufflepuff. A Hufflepuff, Hufflepuff, Hufflepuff. I think they would be proud of me.

[2010]

Hogwarts is great, I write Vic, but I miss all of you. Give Granny a kiss from me, will you? Tell Uncle Harry he doesn't have to worry so much. And check on my Gramps; he doesn't like telling me how he really is when I'm away. Can't wait to have you here next year.


End file.
